Thursday, June 14, 2012

Attachment. Detachment...

You know your faults and you know your desires. You know the feeling you get when all results are as desired. You know what you think of yourself and what you expect everyone else to think of you. You know your favourite pair of Jeans and the story of the marks, stains and holes in it. You know the happiest people and you don't really care why there are so, You just like to spend some time within their aura. You know you shouldn't go so far in the day without brushing your teeth. You know the persona that's public and you try to adhere to it. You know how you act around other persons and how difficult it gets to be cool and funny (You know you will simutaneously be around folks who make your character contradict itself). You know these impressions will last longer than the facade.
You wonder why these things always happen to you. You wonder if it would have been different if you lied. You wonder why you are special and why bad things happen to good people. You wonder if you are right or stupid. You wonder if colours can define your mood and if your ink reflects your stance. You wonder about belief and understanding. You wonder about money and yours. You wonder why people 'don't get'. You wonder if it is necessary. You wonder if they will knowtice. You wonder what it would feel like in a different place. You wonder how shit works. You wonder how a country could be so fucked. You wonder if letting go was a mistake. You wonder about anarchy in a future well after your time. You wonder how a little change in the formation would score. You wonder why a lot more than you ask why. You wonder if those were the wrong expressions. You wonder if anyone else have your dreams or if you are really dreaming. You wonder about what you want.
You want to die healthy and sane and punctually. You want to do good with your power. You want an inspiring instigation. You want more. You want the accolades to be well deserved. You want your playlist. You want days to be as lengthy as you want. You want to apologize without saying it. You want to be seen around worthy and familiar faces. You want to pay before you owe. You want to run. You want it to be rested. You want to burn shit up and watch the flames. You want someone that gets. You want it to end better than it started. You want that golden silence and that pleasurable pain. You want total control and self discipline. You want to get with the program. You want to let loose and bond up properly. You want to smile at worries and toss in a calm 'fuck it' in the air regularly. You want space...

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